No Wrong Way to Parent
Fathers are only as essential to healthy child development as mothers. Psychology Today clarified,"Fatherhood turns out to be a complicated and one of a kind phenomenon with enormous consequences for the psychological and intellectual growth of children." 1
Erik Erikson, a leader in the world of child psychology, argues that a dad's love and a mother's love are different. Fathers"adore more dangerously" since their love is more"expectant, more instrumental" than a mother's love. 2 A dad brings unique contributions to the job of parenting a child that no one else could replicate. Following are some of the most compelling ways that a father's involvement makes a positive difference in a child's life.
Fathering specialist Dr. Kyle Pruett clarifies that fathers have a different style of communication and interaction with children.
This diversity, in itself, provides of contrasting children. This understanding is critical for their development.
Fathers play differently.
Fathers tickle more, they wrestle, and they throw their kids in the air (while mother says..."Not so large!") . Fathers chase their children, sometimes as playful, scary"monsters."
Fathering expert John Snarey clarifies that kids who roughhouse with their fathers learn that kicking, biting and other forms of physical violence are not acceptable. 3 They learn self-control by being told when"enough is enough" and when to repay. Boys and girls both understand a balance between timidity and aggression.
Fathers build confidence.
Proceed to any park and listen to the parents. Who's encouraging kids to swing or climb just a little higher, ride their bike just a little faster, throw just a little harder? Who is encouraging kids to be careful? Mothers shield and dads encourage kids to push the limits.
Both of these parenting styles by themselves can be unhealthy. The other tends to prevent risk, which may fail to build independence and confidence. Together, they help children stay safe while expanding their experiences and raising their confidence.
A significant study demonstrated that when speaking to children, moms and dads are different. Mothers will simplify their words and also talk on the child's level. Men are not as inclined to modify their language for your child. The mother's manner facilitates immediate communication; the dad's way challenges the kid to expand her vocabulary and linguistic abilities -- a significant building block of academic success.
Educational psychologist Carol Gilligan informs us that dads stress justice, fairness and duty (based on principles ), while moms stress sympathy, maintenance and help (according to relationships). Fathers tend to observe and enforce rules holistically and sternly, teaching children the consequences of wrong and right. Mothers tend toward elegance and compassion, offering a sense of hopefulness. Again, either of these disciplinary strategies by themselves is bad, but collectively , they create a healthy, proper equilibrium.
Fathers prepare children for the real world.
Involved dads help children see that attitudes and behaviours have consequences. Or, if they don't do well in school, they won't get into a good school or secure a desired job.
Fathers provide a peek at men's entire world.
Men and women are different. They consume differently. They deal with life. Girls and boys that grow up with a father are more familiar and secure with the curious world of men.
They understand which behaviors are inappropriate.
They also possess a healthy familiarity with the world of men -- that they do not wonder how a guy's facial stubble feels or what it's like to be hugged by strong arms. This knowledge builds emotional security and security from the manipulation of predatory men.
Boys who grow up with fathers are not as likely to be violent. They've their masculinity confirmed and understand from their fathers how to channel their masculinity and potency in favorable manners. Fathers help toddlers understand appropriate male sexuality, hygiene and behavior in age-appropriate ways. As noted sociologist David Popenoe clarifies,"Fathers are far more than simply'second adults' in the house. Involved fathers -- especially biological dads -- bring positive advantages to their kids that no other person is prone to bring."